Author Stephanie Coontz writes about the thoughts of love and matrimony through out history in the article “The Radical Idea of Marrying for Love. ” Early in the article Coontz quotes an early 20th century writer by the name of George Bernard Shaw. who states. “marriage is an establishment that brings together two people under the influence of the most violent. most insane. most false. and most transient of passions. They are required to curse that they will stay in that excited. unnatural. and wash uping status continuously until decease do them portion. ” ( qtd. in Shaw 378 ) Coontz explains that the thoughts of matrimony today are. although bosom felt. unrealistic and dashing. She reveals that non so long ago the ideas on love and matrimony were really different for many societies and civilizations throughout the universe. Coontz shows how different the feelings of love and matrimony were. She brings the reader to a different topographic point and clip with the interesting inside informations about love and matrimony. She stated that the Greek philosopher. Plato. believed that love was non an emotion suited for matrimony. Love. for some societies. was first and first meant for the drawn-out household non for hubby and married woman.
Coontz besides writes about the ancient Indian civilization. they believed love was meant to develop after a matrimony had begun and to make so prior would do jobs for the twosome socially. She writes about how the Europeans felt the emotions brought on by love were marks of insanity and could be cured merely by the act of sex. and non needfully with 1s matrimonial spouse. Coontz states that the Chinese saw love between married twosomes as a menace to the kineticss of the full household. She besides portions inside informations of Europe. during the 12th century ; unfaithfulness in matrimony was non viewed as tabu. In fact. true love was meant for familiarity outside of the matrimony. It was common cognition that male monarchs and Queenss. for centuries. married for political grounds salvaging their love for others. It was believed by many that love was meant for the kept woman. non the married woman. Coontz made it a point to advert that non all societies deemed matrimony loveless. but twosomes were to follow rigorous regulations about public shows of fondness.
She tells us that medieval Muslims. although promoted sexual familiarities between hubby and married woman. felt that excessively much familiarity would decrease 1s devotedness to God. She writes about Africans. more specifically the Fulbe people. and how they do non see love as an of import portion of matrimony. Fulbe adult females will decline that they have any type of feelings of love for their hubbies. They feel inordinate feelings of love would endanger their manner of life. doing twosomes to retreat socially from society. Coontz states that work forces and adult females of this folk would get married for convenience or other societal benefits instead than love. Coontz feels that for many civilizations love was and still is non the ground twosomes should get married. She tells us the Hindu believes that love is an emotion that grows and develops after a matrimony. She besides writes that early modern Europeans portion the same positions on love after matrimony and that Europeans besides experience immature people need counsel in taking 1s hubby or married woman. Throughout the article Coontz portions that many civilizations pattern arranged matrimonies and the bulk of immature people preferred this agreement. go forthing the troubles that come with happening love for person else to cover with. Polygamy is a topic that is briefly touched on in the article every bit good.
Coontz writes about the Ancient Chinese. the Cheyenne Indians. Tibetans. Eskimos and the adult female of Botswana all sharing similar positions on multiple adult females get marrieding the same adult male. Ancient China was accustomed to work forces holding multiple married womans. Some work forces would even take on one wife’s sister as another married woman or lover. Married Eskimo twosomes frequently believed in the unfastened matrimony slogan. where the twosomes would trade hubbies and married womans to partake in sexual intercourse. It was non unusual for Tibetan adult females to get married two or more brothers. all of which she had sexual dealingss with. China is non the lone civilization to take part in co-wives. adult females in Botswana and the Cheyenne Indians of the United States both were really fond of holding co-wives. The Indian married womans felt a certain chumminess between each other and the Botswana adult females felt holding multiple married womans made their work as adult females easier.
Coontz provinces. today. western society would be appalled at this type of sexual behaviour. Coontz believes that people have ever fallen in love. but in the past matrimony was more of a concern proposal instead than the connection of two people in love. If love was portion of matrimony it was considered a luxury non an facet that was needed. Coontz goes on to depict the thoughts for love in matrimony in the modern western society. She states that the outlooks of matrimony include the twosome holding a deep unconditioned love chosen for themselves without the influence of others. The twosome must set each other first before anyone including household and friends. They must be loyal to one another and portion with each other their dreams and aspirations. jobs and secrets. and must ne’er take portion in unfaithfulness. Coontz goes on to compose about how these outlooks of matrimony have ne’er been more far from the thoughts of love and matrimony centuries ago. She feels that these regulations or beliefs will surely hold an unwanted impact on the outlooks people have for a healthy happy matrimony.
Coontz. Stephanie. “A Pop Quiz on Marriage ; The Radical Idea of Marrying for Love. ” Writing and Reading Across the Curriculum. 11th edition. Eds. Lawrence Behrens and Leonard Rosen. Upper Saddle River. New jersey: Pearson. 2011. 376-389. Print.