For many people, getting a divorce is not an option. Instead, they remember their vows, pledged before God, which promises love, honor, and respect for each other. Unfortunately, my marriage was irreconcilable, faced with endless bouts of unfaithfulness, absence of communication, and a magnitude of stressful years. I have had to make many major decisions in my life, but my decision to divorce my husband left a lasting impression. I met my ex-husband in 1994, while working as a police officer in Texas. We were so in love, and after dating for 2 years, we decided to get married.
A year later, I became pregnant with our first child, a girl and 5 years later, we had a son. We did all the things that normal families did while raising 2 kids, we attended baseball games, watched movies, went to the park, and made sure we tucked the kids into bed at night. However, 6 years into the marriage my husband’s absences became more and more frequent. He would often miss our son’s soccer games and our daughter’s dance recital, which he blamed on work. For months, when I would ask my husband, “Where have you been? ” His fed me lies, which led to more lies.
I soon discover, the man I loved and married was being unfaithful to me, by having an affair with his co-worker. One reason, I made the major decision to get a divorce was due to my husband’s infidelities, which left me broken and confused thus, transforming our once beautiful marriage into a cold and meaningless union. As the years disappeared, so did my husband’s obligations. By this time, he had already been involved in multiple relationships, both with women I knew and others I did not know. There were times when his mistresses would call our home, demanding to speak with my husband.
His lack of respect for our marriage angered me, which caused us to argue about any and everything. For a long time, I made myself believe that my decision to stay in the marriage was totally for the sake of our children. However, my decision to stay did not mean I intended to reclaim my husband or marriage; it was more about my fear of raising our children alone. Another reason I pursed a divorce was due to communication or lack thereof. My husband I would not speak for days at a time, even though we lived in the same house. We communicated in the presences of our kids, but I knew they could feel the tension in our home.
Finally, since the divorce, I find my children and I are much happier and less stressed. During my marriage, my stress level was through the roof, causing me to develop high blood pressure, which required medication in order to keep it stable. In conclusion, my decision to get a divorce was a decision that came with a lot of thought. In the beginning, we were so in love, but my ex-husband’s infidelities, lack of communication, and added stress, which not only affected me, was also affecting our children. My decision to divorce was a decision made with no regrets.
