As I sat in my bedroom listening to Wale’s song “Ambition. ” I turned up the volume in an attempt to block the sounds coming from the other side of the door. They were not sounds of joy and happiness; rather they were angry and bitter voices. As accusations were being hurled outside my room wall, I sat on my bed feeling like the loneliest person in the world. I thought to myself, “How could two people who have shown me so much love speak to each other with such hatred and disgust?
All I heard was shattering of glass against the floor, and pounding of fists against the solid beige walls. I wished and wished for the noise to end, but what I didn’t realize was the end of it would change my life forever. It all started when I heard the arguing almost every day. Then one day my parents walked into my room and with hushed and nervous tones, they started to explain everything. As my mother was talking to me, I felt an overwhelming sense of sadness.
I was crying hysterically, not being able to keep up with the tears that were rolling down my face. That’s when it had hit me that this was actually happening; they were getting a divorce and it was final. All sorts of feelings came to mind, but all I did was cry making my sight of vision a blur. My face turned cherry red and I felt a wave of heat rush over my body. Even after my clear sight of vision came back, things were still fuzzy. What had worried me the most was that my family had been broken apart.
And I couldn’t help wondering what if my parents would have ended up looking at each other with hatred? I looked up to them individually but also as a couple. They barely ever fought but I guess things are different behind closed doors. I tried my hardest to think positively about the situation, but all I could think about was my parents not being happy anymore. I kept thinking about the main events that would happen in the future such as my graduation or my basketball games.
I want both of them to be there cheering for me as a family and just present for every major event that happens in my life. I want both my parents to be there but I want them to get along as they did before this all happened. I hated knowing that they were never going to live in the same house and under the same roof any more, that everything had to be split in half. I spent that whole night thinking about how my life would change forever, but maybe it was for the better. This situation might not have been how I wanted it to end, but this wasn’t up to me anymore.
There was nothing I could have done that would have changed their minds. I then realized not only would my life be different in the future; it would also be effecting my life today. Everything that would be different in my life such as, there would be alternating weeks at each other parent’s house, hauling luggage from one location to another, celebrating holidays twice and having two separate family dinners, and not waking up to seeing both of them every morning was a memory I cherished the most.
I knew I would miss everything about our old life together, just seeing them while they were happy and actually cracking jokes with each other would have to be the number one thing I will the most. I loved seeing them happy, laughing and giggling with and at each other, it reminded me of when my family was at their happiest moments. All these positive thoughts came to mind from the past when they were at their happiest. Then all of a sudden, everything turned into negative thoughts. I was just thinking about myself, and how I would feel about my parents splitting apart for good.
My mother and father both asked me how I felt about it and I cried hysterically, but I never once seemed to even think about them, and their feelings towards the situation. They were unhappy and I would not have wanted them to be miserable for the rest of their lives for my sake. I did not like seeing my parents wake up in a bad mood, I wanted to see them both happy and if that meant them not being together anymore, then that is how it had to end. Even though I didn’t think I was ever going to get used to it, I tried my hardest for my family’s sake.
It just so happens that they stayed friends and they still shared a special bond that no one could break. They have spent 18 years of their lives together as lovers and best friends. That long of a relationship could not have just been thrown away and forgotten about. Many memories that never could have been forgotten about as a family were most likely their wedding and the birth of their child. They say never take things in life for granted because someday those things could be taken away in the blink of an eye.
No one would have ever guessed that my family would have been broken apart. Everything used to be so perfect but things change and so do people. The love of their marriage just did not exist anymore. Their perfect chemistry had been torn apart and their love for each other had faded away. They agreed on staying friends and that’s how it ended, in friendship. They had one thing that they would always share and that was the love for their child. The bond between a child and a parent could never be broken, no matter what the outcome.