At the heart of the human condition is the reality that we would rather be destroyed by praise than saved by criticism. It takes nerve to wake up and become who you truly are. There is no better tale about self-identity than Mark Twain’s Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. The peculiar mind of Huck Finn is thrown into a hypocritical, judgmental, and hostile world, yet Huck has one escape–the Mississippi River that flows nearby. While Huck is on the Mississippi River, he feels unchained from the bonds of society much like I feel in moments when I stand by my own beliefs; however, when Huck and I are within grasp of the social constraints spawned from our respective lands, we exhibit a natural tendency to conform to society’s norms.
The river allows Huck to speak freely with Jim about life unlike anywhere else just as the island of Los Negritos created a bond betweeen me and my cousin Gabriel. After escaping the Shepardson farm fiasco, Huck and Jim end up laying on the raft admiring the world around them.“We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened” (Twain 123). The entire mood surrounding the night allows Huck and Jim to philosophize with each other about the stars. It’s a beautiful moment in the novel because it’s the first time we see Huck be completely comfortable with himself and with Jim.
The islands of Puerto Rico is where my raft and stars lie. Before the start of my freshman year, I went to visit family in Puerto Rico. I spent most of my days hanging with my cousin Gabriel. One day we decided to take a boat over to the empty island of Los Negritos. The day was spent on swimming and an insane amount of frisbee passes. At night we made a fire and that’s when I actually got to know the kid I called my cousin. He told me about how depressed he would get about school and how afraid he was that he would never get out of the island.
I talked to him about how scared I was that I wouldn’t live up to my parents’ picture of me. It ended up being two kids talking about how scared they were for the future, but, for some reason, it’s one of my favorite memories to this day. It brought us closer together and just talking about it made me feel less afraid. Gabriel was my Jim and he still is now. Huck’s instinct to lie about his identity to Mrs. Judith Loftus parallels my distortion of the truth when pretending to be a college student at Notre Dame. While in town to inquire about his murder, Huck meets a lady named Mrs. Loftus, who begins testing Huck to ascertain whether or not he is truly what he says he is.
When she begins by questioning him with “What’s your real name? Is it Bill, or Tom, or Bob?—or what is it?” (Twain 62). Huck comes to the quick realization that he cannot get away with his lie and decides to tell her a half-truth instead. “it wouldn’t be no use to try to play it any longer, and I would just make a clean breast and tell her everything, but she musn’t go back on her promise” (Twain 63). Huck displays an indifference to telling the truth numerous times throughout the novel. It countradicts the person he is when he’s with Jim on the river because he is constantly lying about his own identity. It’s difficult for me to judge Huck’s integrity when I myself am at fault for lying when it wasn’t neccessary. Over break, I took a trip with some friends to visit the University of Notre Dame.
We met up with my friend’s sister and got to have a taste of the “college experience”. Throughout the trip, I would constantly be meeting cool people and end up lying to them about my own age. On top of that, I would lie about what my major was and it ended up with me being a completely made up person. People eventually figured it out and I lost the opportunity to actually develop friendships with some of the people I met. All because I thought it would be funny to pretend to be someone else. Nowadays I look back to realize just how much a lie can change the way you feel about someone. Being true to yourself can only pay off in the long run. Huck’s relationship with the river is one of peace and joy, similar to the relationship that I have with Lake Pleasant.
Throughout the story, Huck emphasizes the beauty of the river and describes it in great detail when he says, “Next we slid into the river and had a swim, so as to freshen up and cool off; then we set down on the sandy bottom where the water was about knee deep, and watched the daylight come” (Twain 121). Huck’s experience in the river is beautiful and displays a rich connection between a boy and his river. Huck paints a stunning image of the river that surpasses any description of nature anywhere else in the novel. Huck feels at peace with himself when he’s on the vibrant river. Lake Pleasant is my Missippi River. I’m there almost every summer and some of my best swimming memories come from Lake Pleasant. It’s a place where I’m able to let go of stress and just be a kid.
At night the lake is dead quiet. “Not a sound anywheres—perfectly still—just like the whole world was asleep…” (Twain 121). The placid state of the river makes me feel like I’m in complete tranquility. Lake Pleasant always takes me back to my inner-child like no other place. Huck’s encounter with Grangerfords exposes him to the detrimental aspects of competitiveness much like my competitiveness got the best of me in my own academics.
Huck learns about the family feud between the Grangerfords and the Shepardsons when Buck explains, “a feud is this way: A man has a quarrel with another man, and kills him; then that other man’s brother kills HIM; then the other brothers, on both sides, goes for one another; then the COUSINS chip in—and by and by everybody’s killed off, and there ain’t no more feud. But it’s kind of slow, and takes a long time” (Twain 112). The intense rivalry between the two families is a resultant of the competitive nature between both families. Huck becomes terrified by this and by the end of the chapter flees the land with Jim at his side.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t as smart as Huck when it came to the allure of competition. I use the word ”competition” loosely because it became an excuse for me to cheat myself out of my own education. It was really me cutting corners. The temptation of getting the best grade possible without accounting for the means got the best of me. I lost my moral compass for a letter. Unlike Huck, I had to learn the hard way that my moral identity should never sway when making my own decisions.
The Adventures of Huck Finn is one of the most brilliant coming of age stories to be gifted upon the world. It tells the tale of a young boy who learns to stand up to the norms of society. Huck struggles along the way but he comes out a better person. He learns to be true to himself. I strive to do the exact same. Just as Huck isn’t perfect, nor are all the decisions I make. There have been more than a handful of moments where I pretend to be someone I’m not. I forget myself along the way, but even people who forget who they are; they always remain with an identity that is not their real self. It’s just a projected self that doesn’t really exist.
Huck isn’t a girl nor is he part of a family rivalry. Huck is that kid in the river. The one who looks up at the stars at night and who watches the sunrise. Huck Finn is Huck Finn. I wanted to end this essay by talking about how I see myself in Huck Finn, but that’s not true. I don’t go against the crowd, I don’t have a set moral compass, and I certainly don’t think the stars were just “made up”. I’m not Huck Finn, but that’s okay. I’m still figuring out who I am. I have plenty to learn and experience but I’m confident that, with the right guidance, I’ll become a man that I can be proud of. No, I’m not Huck Finn, and I’m okay with that.
