The influences that have shaped my identity are my parents, who always taught me right from wrong. Who were always there for me even though I may have disappointed them at one or more times in my life. Although, I had to quit college after only attending one semester because I got pregnant my parents were still there to guide me and support my decisions. I am a good thinker because I have grown to be honest with myself I have learned to accept my mistakes and learn from them.
On the other hand, I am also like the poor thinker because I do judge people on what they wear, their attitudes, or their way of thinking. But as we all know from experience, we cant help it. I once believed that lying was the only way out of hurting another person but after lying on many occasions not to get caught got me nowhere. I would lie on numerous times to my boyfriend that when the relationship got serious and committed he couldnt help but throw my past lies in my face, especially during an argument. So after 2 years I have learned to always be honest regardless of the outcome.
And so far it has worked to my favor. I try not to always believe rumors I hear. Most of the time the rumors that I hear are not true, they are a minor lie that turned into a good believable story. But then again when a good rumor is heard I cant help but to listen to it. I find it very hard to say, I dont know, to my son.
Hes 5 years old and I believe he should always get an answer to all of his questions, even if I have to come back to him later and answer his questions. If I feel that opinion about something should be heard I make sure Im informative. Otherwise, I usually just listen to the opinions of others. I sometimes will say, mine is better, especially if I tried to copy a style that others use or in decorating. I am very creative, so when it comes to decorating the house I will always say, mine is better. With my personal problems the only time my way of thinking has affected me is with the opinion of others.
I feel very confident and proud of my creations that I dont take criticism very well. I hate it when my fianc disagrees with me. Most of the time we compromise and agree on the same thing. But when he disagrees with me I dont take it very well. Usually we will end up in an argument. I am very emotional when it comes to the relationship I have with my father.
He is a very closed and to himself kind of man, so it makes it hard to please him. When I dont please him I feel very hurt and get emotional. I am very accepting to change. I believe change can be a good thing in many ways.
I dont understand insecurity. My understanding when it comes to a relationship is you should always be sure of whom you are with without any doubts in mind. And when it comes to personal insecurity, everyone should be happy with who they are. Any small defect can be easily corrected if one really wants to. I feel the strongest urge to conform to my parents, especially my mom. She has always been there for me even when I let her down.
Now, as an adult I want to conform her as much as I can. My most precious image of myself is my heart. Without it I wouldnt love or have a personality. I always follow my heart and it never lies to me.
Because of that is why I am a very pleasant person to with and a good friend. The only two people which I am most anxious to think well of me are once again my parents. I know that I hurt them very must and caused disappointment when I had my son without being married and before being done with college. Therefore, it is very important to me .
