At any moment you have a choice, one that leads you closer to spirit or further away from it. Letting go give us freedom, freedom to start all over again. The very first ray of sunlight appears and breaks down the long dark night as I get up and start my new day. A normal day in America with cold winds and white snow on the grass. I open the window and the cold cuts onto my skin. Suddenly, somewhere in my heart the warm sunny days of when I was still in Vietnam comes to mind. Today is Lunar New Year’s also known as Tet.
This is my first New Year’s away from home. I cannot avoid the strangeness and the loneliness that torments me step by step. Everybody is still busy with their jobs and forgot to decorate outside. There is no one on the street, there is only the dazzlingly white snow. In Vietnam nobody would work today. Students returned home from college and stay up all night with their families around the stove to cook the traditional food Banh Chung. During this Holiday children would receive lucky money.
They got up earlier than usual and wore new clothes. Then, they followed their parents to visit their relatives to give wishes and hopes of a thriving and healthy new year. I miss the Apricot Blossoms that smiled under the cloudless sky and fell down by playful winds then covered the street in yellow. I also miss the drizzling rains of the spring which were all but a memory now. In the circle of life, people walk so fast that when they look back, everything they once cherished now only exists in their memories.
I’m not young enough to be called a kid and receive lucky money or to live without worries. I’m now old enough to think about my future and about what I want to become. Life will not stop to wait for anyone. Starting a new life means that some memories will come while others go away, sometimes you must leave behind the past to move on. I will always keep those memories deep in my heart. Suddenly, I can feel the loneliness awaken deep in my heart. The loneliest thing in the world is a soul when it is making ready to go on its mysterious.
It is a far journey to go. I still don’t know what my future will bring but I am now ready to face it. I return home in the evening after a hard day at work. Surprisingly, my parents and relatives are preparing for a big party for New Year’s. I still have my family here in the last day of old year. A day full of laughter while everything outside is still quite. A small part of Vietnam can exist in America so long as my family is nearby. I ask myself “do I need anything else? “. What will be, will be…
