The Dumb Farm
We have all encountered someone dumb in our lives, and most likely, it has been more than one person. Everyday I meet someone who is completely oblivious to what is happening, or someone who speaks out loud before they think about what
they are going to say. Yes, at times we all have our dumb moments, but some people
live life being dumb. For example, students that raise their hands every five minutes
and make obnoxious comments or ask questions that have just been answered. The
people who, during every passing period, abruptly stop in the middle of a crowded
hallway and talk with six of their friends right in front of the door. People who go up to
the most crowded, most popular movie theatre in town and try to pay with a credit card
when they know the theatre has accepted only cash for the last four years, then try to
tell the ticket seller they paid with a credit card last time. Lunch ladies who are
incapable of calculating five dollars minus one dollar, or, who quite frankly cannot
count at all. People who get on your every last nerve all the time, and are to dumb to
notice. These are all examples of people who are dumb, and the sad part: we have to
live with people like this every day.
The good news is that I have come up with a solution. First, a test is taken once
every year to determine exactly how dumb you are. The test will measure common
sense, social skills, and overall knowledge. A failing grade in any one of these
categories will result in the second part of the solution: departure. A desolate
spot in the world will be reserved for test failures, for now we will refer to this place as
the dumb farm. Anyway, this is where they will live forever so they can breed with
people equally dumb as themselves. This way, a smart person will not have the
opportunity to breed with someone dumb and the chances of having dumb children in
our world will lessen.
The dumb farm will be exactly like our civilization, except that the dumb people
will run it. They will have the jobs, they will make the rules, and maybe some smart
people could help them get started. Schools wouldn’t work because no one would
be qualified to teach, but realistically, there was probably no hope for these children
I bet you are wondering who will determine what dumb means, and how we will
keep the dumb farm from becoming overpopulated. Well, smart people will determine
“dumb.” We would first have to find a way to establish a few smart people, that way
they can administer the first test. We are guessing that the people in the dumb farm will
have offspring (these children can take the test if they wish, to see if they are smart)
and eventually, after a few generations of dumb people, they might become too dumb
to breed. Sooner or later they will, and then they will all be gone. So, in conclusion, we
want the dumb people to die off.
At first, this may seem harsh, but the results will be worth it. Smart people will
be able to live life every day without feeling astonished from witnessing stupidity.
This process would be the beginning to a more advanced society. We wouldn’t have
to spend our time feeling sorry for the less fortunate. Honestly, stress in the smart
people would minimize, and this too would better our educated world. We won’t have to yell profanities while we drive, or get mad because, while in the grocery line, the person behind us has hit us with their cart at least five times in two minutes.
This could be the beginning of world peace, and it can all start with the departure of
a few dumb people.